I grew up in a country where every house had a fence of some kind surrounding it. Some were elaborate structures complete with hideous gargoyles placed at regular intervals, and presumably designed to keep the kids next door next door. I know a thing a thing or two about fences having leapt a few low ones in my youth, so it seems most natural that I would be drawn to the government’s proposal to build a fence along our southern border.
This is going to be a massive undertaking, what with a border 1450 miles long, spanning miles of physically hostile territory. Any such construction will, of necessity, require structural soundness and proven longevity. It will be handy to afford space for troops or border guards to patrol not only from behind the wall, but also on top, the better to detect any attempts at tunneling. Such a wall would be mighty indeed and shall go down in history as a great wall.
And by happy coincidence, I have been able to locate just such an item that we could probably have for a fair price. And what’s more, it has been lightly used and has a reputation for longevity. My only worry is that the transportation costs may be daunting, as the wall I’m thinking of is 4,500 miles long. However, all is not lost. In the true spirit of entrepreneurship, I would suggest we use 1,450 miles for ourselves and sell the remainder to the country that has long wanted to keep Americans out of their territory, those pesky northerners in
Naturally, there’s some assembly required. Actually, there is a lot of assembly required. My first thought was to outsource the assembly work for the northern wall to workers from
Those of you capable of doing the math are thinking the left over wall from our great southern project wouldn’t be enough to span the Canadian border, but I assure you, Canada has little to fear from Washington state, home of some of the best marijuana grown anywhere in the world.
The southern wall will be a lot more difficult to erect. At the best of times it is piping hot in
In the true spirit of entrepreneurship, that leaves us with no recourse but to ask…the Chinese.